Friday, 31 December 2010


Can you hear that noise? Listen really carefully...there...did you hear that very faint noise getting louder and louder as the ring of cash tills dings all over the land. Yep, it would seem that old Blighty has gone completely bonkers and peeps are rushing, yes rushing, out to make expensive purchases before the VAT rises up to 20% on 4th January. And we are one of them.

The oven was an obvious purchase. No-one can really live without an oven, unless they want to blitz everything to death in a microwave. Clearly we are not those people. The oven that we bought is truly beautiful, if such words can be used to describe a necessary appliance. It's energy A which is something I always aspire to. And it has all these jazzy things on it which means you can cook things like pizza and cake and bread without having to preheat the oven, very environmentally conscious. It breaks down into two ovens as well and according to the diagram, in this snazzy double oven you can be cooking a turkey in the bottom and muffins in the top. Erm, is there anyone who would actually do that?! Surely right there are two things that shouldn't go in an oven together, but maybe they now can. The future is apparently here, raw meat and cake rejoice in your same space!

And so to our next purchase. I did blog about how we got distracted when shopping for ovens by looking at the biiiiig televisions. And how we drooled. Well, we quit drooling and went and bought one!!!! And OMG it is gorgeous. It's 40 inches which just seems ma-hoooosive compared to what we had before. And it's so shiny and so flat and so god-damned clever that Wavey and I are a wee bit stumped how to make it work. Like right now for instance, he's just put his USB in the back of it with our holiday photos and now they're right up there on our 40 inch screen in glorious colour. A-mazing! How does this shit work? Anyone? Not that I really want an answer you understand, basically I'm just in love with it. New technology is truly fabulous and I embrace it fully and wholly and bugger it I'm just going to say it, lustfully!

It's nearly 2011. Hard to believe that a whole year has flown by. A whole year since I've lived and loved in this very house with Wavey. A truly fabulous year! And a whole year that we've contributed to the economy very much as we seem to break appliances at an astonishing rate. In this year we've had to replace:

  • Washing machine
  • Oven
  • Kettle
  • Hoover

We didn't have to replace the television but we did anyway. And I think we're going to get biiiiig enjoyment from our biiiiiig shiny new television!

Happy New Year one and all and I'll see ya in 2011 x

Monday, 27 December 2010

It's Chreeeeeeeestmas!

Christmas means so many different things to different people. These are just a few photos to demonstrate what Christmas means to me.

First up, it's seeing bestest friends who live far away and get to come up for Christmas holiday fun. It's inviting them round to your house and drinking wine and getting them to join in with decorating the Christmas cake so that a joint effort from Tizz, Wavey and myself ends up looking like our fabulous Christmas cake igloo:

It's laughing hysterically at a pair of welly boots sticking out of the side of a cake and placing penguins on top of bricks:

It's getting the best Christmas presents ever that other people think are completely insane but are given with love and true knowledge of what will make that person so happy:

It's shiny lights in a snowy landscape that make you feel all slushy and sloppy on an evening walk:

And it's popping out somewhere for a "quick" drink only to return hours later, merry as merry and thinking that this will make a truly great photo...

I hope you all had the merriest of times too - Happy Christmas!

Thursday, 23 December 2010

11 days

11 days!

11 days!

11 days!

This is how many days I have off work. Woooooo-bloomin-hoooooooo!

Oh and I completely forgot in all the oven drama to tell everyone that I have another interview! This time for a Cyberlibrarian - now that's a title I wouldn't mind having. Interview is on 6th January. And I don't have to do a presentation *huge sigh of relief* And it's not in my current work location. Will 2011 be the year that I get a new job...? Exciting!

Wednesday, 22 December 2010

What was that noise...?

You remember last year when I first moved in with Wavey and we'd planned this fabby Christmas? My folks were coming and it was going to be this and going to be that...and then the boiler broke and we had no heating? Well it seems that some sort of curse has befallen us, as tonight our oven exploded.

We were both upstairs; I was trying to make the internet work (another tale altogether) and Wavey was changing a lightbulb in the bathroom when we heard this noise. Not sure what it was, we both just carried on with our tasks at hand and thought about it no more. Shortly afterwards I trotted downstairs to sort out the dinner and stepped in something that cracked underneath my feet. Weird, thinks I, we've only brought in snow with us and not crackly ice. I looked under my feet and noticed small shards of glass. Then it was like something in slow motion as I moved my glance up and noticed that the inside of the oven seemed to have exploded all over our potato wedges. Hmmmm - WAVEY!

And so we find ourselves 3 days before Christmas without an oven. We've been out tonight in the falling snow and tried to get one, but no-one has one that you can just walk away with. It's a time to sell docking stations and ipods and digital radios, who would want to buy an oven 3 days before Christmas. Erm *puts hands up* that would be us please sir. Luckily all the plans we had did not involve roasting a turkey for several hours, nor are we cooking for like 10 people. It's the two of us here. And really, to tell you the truth, even if all we had was beans on toast with some melted cheese on the top it wouldn't spoil Christmas!

But what an end to a seriously crappy week. There's been some horrible shit gone down this week that has completely and utterly left me raw. Today we got a phone call from a work colleague telling us that her dad had died. It's just awful. I don't understand why all this crappy stuff has to happen to really nice people. Put all this with the fact that I have this god-awful cold that came out of nowhere and will not go away, my nose is red raw and it's freezing so it feels like my face might fall off everytime I go outside, I had to cancel my hair appointment on Saturday as I felt so rubbish so my fringe is falling in my eyes and my roots are showing through...merry chuffin Christmas eh?

I phoned my ma tonight to tell her the woes of the oven and we ended up laughing. They'd had this awful family visit involving a man holding an entire conversation with my dad whilst sat in his grubby vest, and we'd been all round Evil Park with no success at buying an oven. But plenty of drooling over huge flat screen televisions, and funky mixers, and docking stations to drool over! As she ever so sweetly pointed out, we (as in Wavey and I) have each other and all these things that come our way to test us just prove how strong our relationship is. I don't know about you, but I can think of nothing better to have for Christmas.

Friday, 17 December 2010

Downstairs I shall stay

Found out today that I didn't get the job. It didn't really come as too much of a surprise to me. Upon completing my very first ever presentation, that I managed to make last more than 8 minutes, all I really wanted to do was slump down in the seat and have a cup of tea. I certainly wasn't equipped to deal with 3 very tough strategic questions. So began the waffling. I think I pulled it back by the end but it wasn't enough this time round. But you know what? It's okay, really it is. One of my very good buds got the job and I couldn't be happier as she truly harbours the dream of Librarian. I on the other hand, am thinking yet again that this is not the future profession for me.

It's not the first time I've had these doubts. For years now I've been wondering on an almost daily basis what it is that I actually want to do with my life. I'm hoping to know soon but hey, no hurry eh :)

Even though the news was disappointing it was actually an okay kind of day. The big boss lady asked for 5 minutes of my time where she informed me that my presentation was excellent and she asked me if I would consider showing it to all staff...wowsers! I would never have guessed in a million years that she would say that, ever. And it made me feel pretty good. The presentation was a hurdle that I needed to overcome. I did it, and I must have done pretty okay - and I feel proud of myself for that achievement. I had a bit of banter with one of my favourite subject librarians and lots of chit chat with my lovely colleagues. It's done, the decision was made and there's no point pouting about it. It wasn't going to spoil my day; the never ending stats that I'm working on will do that all by themselves, no point adding something else to the mix.

To be honest, I feel kind of relieved. I blogged a couple of weeks ago about not being entirely sure if it was what I wanted, and the idea of going "upstairs" is still something I say in hushed tones. The relief that I feel is obviously a mixture of all sorts, that this week is finally over, that I survived the presentation and interview, that I've made a start on is definitely all those things. But it's also a quiet phew about being able to stay exactly where I am with all my lovely warm peeps that make me happy. Is that really so bad...?

A few weeks ago I made a tentative step towards getting some experience in a whole new field by volunteering in the fund-raising team of a local hospice. The two referees must have returned glowing references as I've had an email asking for a meeting after Christmas. I don't know what it will bring, or even if it's something that I will enjoy but I believe it's a step in the right direction. A small step to move away from continuously moaning about how awful work is by finding out what else might be out there for me. 2011 might just be the year that shows me a new path to follow.

This has been rather a serious post for wee Dizz, not the kind of tone I normally follow. So just to reassure you all that normal service has resumed, I shall make my final point: clearly the cool factor will remain downstairs where it belongs and not *whispers* "upstairs" in that alternative strange land. Stay cool forever...

Thursday, 16 December 2010

The drawl of y'all

I'm going to begin this post by saying that if you're a fan of Beverley Barton you should stop reading now. Seriously, cease and desist immediately as I'm about to be very insulting. Fair warning.

Okay, for those of you still with me, I've just finished reading Cold Hearted by said Ms Barton. It promises to be terrifying and gripping. It was neither. In fact it really wasn't very good at all. I thought at first that it was just going to be trash but I think even that's being generous. It was, as I'm fond of saying, utter shite. And whoever read it and thought it was "terrifying" has clearly not read some of the crime fiction that I have, cos some of that stuff really is keep you awake at night creepy and scary. You, Ms Barton, are just silly.

I've not been to Georgia so perhaps I'm being a tad unfair here, but seriously, do "y'all" go round saying y'all every other word, cos that's what she did. And if she wasn't y'all-ing all over the place, she was honey-ing. It was barmy and rather boring for someone who has never and will never utter the phrase y'all, except when taking the piss out of such strange phrases. I'm well aware that all places have their own peculiar way of speaking, the Teesside way is hardly the best trust me, but it's just so...strange? odd? hence the drawl of y'all. Cos when I do try to speak it, it sounds all wrong coming out of my north east England accented voice. I'm pretty sure you have to be all about the drawl in order to say y'all correctly. And it's hard to type too! I am baffled by the use of such a word or is it a phrase? If Fizz is reading this she'll know, being the grammar queen that she is.

In conclusion, I really would find it very hard to recommend Beverley Barton for anything, other than the pile of books to return to the charity shop. I'll make a mental note never to pick one up again and am hoping that my next choice will satisfy me much more. Stay tuned for the next book review!

Wednesday, 15 December 2010

Walking the plank

Things what have happened this week:

1. Learned how to do the plank in pilates. It hurts. A lot. And yet I love pilates so.

2. Had my interview. Where I survived my first ever presentation, and it lasted over 8 minutes. I'm still waiting to hear about the job but to be honest I'm not holding my breath. I was so relieved that I had finished the presentation I just wanted to slump in my seat and breathe for a while, but instead I had to answer questions about "upstairs" stuff of which I know very little about. Cue waffling. I think I pulled it round by the end but who can know. Either way - I'm very proud of myself for doing that presentation. I was crapping myself and I did it, yay me!

3. I won an award, as voted by my colleagues, for being the most cheerful, most sunny and most huggable person - I am officially a sunbeam. And I have a sparkly green medal and a certificate to prove it.

4. My brand new sparkly shiny ipod is synching as I type. Over 2000 songs should be enough for my average bus journey...

5. I definitely had the best interview outfit on. I was truly rocking it. No black suit for me, no sir-eee Bob.

6. My laptop is starting to do strange things. CRUCIAL BATTERY is the new watchword, it used to just be low battery. Me no likey. I heart my laptop so.

7. I've got a cold :( boo to germs, boo I tells ya!

8. I made mars bar cake, which was utterly yummy and went down a treat last night at theatre...

9. ...where we played the most hilarious game of football I have ever played. A sight never to be forgotten when Stormin' took a dive from the seats and landed on his knees in a heap and still managed to miss the ball. One of our members nearly wet herself laughing, literally, and the rest of us were bent over double in pain, we laughed so much. Happy times.

10. Christmas has crept ever closer. Eeeeek! Must get organised. I truly must!

Sunday, 12 December 2010


OMG! OMG! Wavey is the bestest boyfriend ever! The postman arrived today (still getting used to Sunday deliveries) with a box from Amazon. Wavey gets this look of glee on his face and then runs into the kitchen telling me "stay in there stay in there". Minutes later he emerges with said Amazon box all wrapped up and presents it to me! Inside is a teeny tiny parcel. At this point he got down on bended knee...and then quickly got back up again because of course he was joking, as if! Inside was one extremely fabulous present...

...inside was one shiny new ipod Nano, the most brandest new of them all that clips on and has a touch screen! In shiny green! And it's 16GB which means I'll never run out of music space ever again! OH MY GOD! Bestest present ever! And it's not even Christmas yet!! Wooooooop!

What a lucky girl I am!

Saturday, 11 December 2010

Merry Friday

Friday was official put up the Christmas decorations at work day. I love this day each year as our team has the most awful, the most tacky, the most gaudy, and the most colourful decorations of all the teams. It generally looks like someone has barfed tinsel all over every available desk and shelf space. It's just fabulous! One of our most favourite things are the awful "dead birds" as we've aptly named them. I have no idea where they came from, who might have considered them in good taste in the first place in order to donate them, but each year they come out and scare the wits out of us! Last year I had a robin that took a nosedive onto my keyboard and attacked me with its pointy plastic beak, so this year I've switched to a slightly more tasteful (!) one, just look at those beautiful curly feathers and EVIL BEADY EYES:

Wavey and I went to see Fizz on the evening. Not at all because it was any kind of celebration that required cards and presents, no, simply because it was Friday. And in order to celebrate this we were going to make wait a minute, we were going to eat whoopies!

Which when we actually opened the box, we discovered that they were actually chocolate sandwiches. Which were sooooo sweet that they nearly made me barf. Wavey finished the other half of mine, simply because he has the sweetest tooth of anyone I've ever known. The whoopies even defeated Fizz and she doesn't defeat easily!

We decided to make the non-celebration a games night as haven't had one of those for ages. We started off with Scrabble, which when we play you score extra points if you can put in a rude word, see mine below:

If only Fizz had put her W in a different place, Wavey would have won out with his 3 available letters: A N K...

And so a happy Friday was had by all. The weekend is finally here after a very long and arduous week, which I was definitely glad to see the back of. Basically I'm now counting down till approximately half 12 on Tuesday when my interview will be over and normal life can resume once more. Amen to that!

Thursday, 9 December 2010

Everyday minus 2

I was doing so well and then I missed a day, and another day. Arse. To make up for it I thought I'd show you a piece of artwork that I stumbled across whilst waiting for the bus:

I think it's very profound and I can totally see that the artist was trying to make a statement about it being a glass half full/empty time of year and the twig is making you think of backbone...or maybe it is simply what it is, sheer coincidence that some litter bug dropped his bottle right next to a twig on the snow. But that's the beautiful thing with art, it can be whatever you want it to be.

I promise to try harder and get back to my daily blogging. Probably with lots of images as I love the idea of Tizz enjoying the advent calendar blog. If only there was a way that a small door could be opened into the internet and you could extract your daily chocolate too...

Monday, 6 December 2010

It's behind you...oh no it's not...

Yep you guessed it, panto week begins tonight. Please enter my version of hell. Millions of grotbag kids high on either performing if they're part of the panto, or from the fizzy sweets that their parents feed them while they watch. People dancing across stage, usually tap dancing, I'm still in recovery from last year's performance where there were literally tits and sequins flying around all over the place *shudder* Stroppy directors, stressed house managers, everyone freezing their asses off cos the theatre is like an icebox and outside is sub zero temperatures...can you feel my joy? Thank god it only lasts for one week (plus matinee!) each year and then it's over and we can return to normal service of depressing plays that our punters seem to love so much.

Oh did I mention that the panto is called Santa in Space? And there's a magic wardrobe that turns into a rocket ship that a small child pops out of and it spins round...I foresee a big pile of vomit inside as said child gets a wee bit overexcited, or the stage manager spins it too fast. It's. just. awful! Hideous! Save me!

Had to work a full day today, sheesh! I'm used to part time hours now, these full time days will be very tough.

I passed at the dentist, shiny teeth are me. When I told him about the magic mouthwash he didn't quite believe it was magic. Sheesh again! It's two colours that merge together to form this magic purple pink shade and you see the bits you've missed when you spit it out...too much? Oh well :))

Snow boots are super. But rubbed my heel and gave me a blister, boo! Having said that, the streets are now like an ice rink so perhaps some ice skates and a sparkley sequinned leotard with American Tan tights might be the way to go outfit wise...for some reason the notion of a furry muff (fnar fnar) just popped into my head there for completing the outfit...

Anyhoo time for dins now. I hope you're impressed with my daily blogging, I'm trying my bestest!

One more time for the cheap seats in the back - it's behind you...all together now: OH NO IT ISN'T...

Sunday, 5 December 2010

Used to be a duck pond.. it's an ice cube. It's beginning to feel like the snow might never go away...

Saturday, 4 December 2010

Snappy Saturday

Been a busy old day, starting off at theatre and ending up in a jolly good trip to town including sweeties, research and giant crackers! Sadly the trip to theatre was the final journey for my battered old painting jeans. The knees have been missing for quite some time but last week saw the first rip of the inner thigh and today it ripped practically all the way across. So farewell beloved jeans, you've seen a lot of projects and been well loved but you must now be relegated in favour of some new ones. But here's a couple of photos so you will be eternally immortalised on the blog:

My trip to town was great. I went in with the intention of buying the sweeties for the goodie drawer at work which opens on Monday, and to hit the public library as they have the largest selection of newspapers which I needed for one of my presentation slides. Both successfully achieved I also mooched around a Christmas craft market which really wasn't that great. But ended up in Boyes, that shop is just the best! Where else could you buy a giant Christmas cracker?! Doesn't the town look so festive:

Finally Wavey and I are enjoying our advent calendar. Not only is there a yummy cheap chocolate heart everyday but there's also a little excerpt on each day:

We're going to end the day with some takeaway, cos it's Saturday and it's allowed. And we're going to watch Jumper, which may be good may be crap, don't really mind either way!

Friday, 3 December 2010

That Friday feeling

Despite all the public transport challenges, this week has been utterly ace! Truly I could get used to a life where you start work at 10am and leave at 2.30pm. Not only do you get a lazy start to the morning, you also get to wander round town when it's not the weekend. Take this morning for instance, instead of being a dutiful housewife (heehee) I sacked the washing up in favour of meeting G for a coffee before we started work at 10. A delicious cup of chai latte (have you ever tried that? So festive!) and a good old chin wag later we headed into work where we put in a couple of hours before it was lunchtime. Met up again for another chinwag over lunch, then back to it for 45 minutes before we headed homeward bound.

Weirdly though, I am clearly more dedicated to work than I thought possible as I experienced slight frustration today that we had to finish so early as my desk is pretty full. I guess if you actually do work part time then you must be given part time tasks otherwise how would you ever catch up with yourself? You'd be constantly chasing your tail round in a bid to complete one task before moving onto the other. It's even harder when you have full time work tasks to complete in reduced hours!

I did what I've done everyday this week which was head into town afterwards. It's actually been rather fortuitous that this snow week has happened in the run up to Christmas as I've been able to get a lot of my pressies without having to battle with the weekend crowds which is a huge relief. Those weekend crowds can be mean with their jostling elbows and giant toy carrier bags.

I got really excited as I finally found a party dress that I loved. And it was extremely bargainous considering how beautiful it was. I tried on the size 14 but it was a teeny bit too snug - no room for food=bad. So picked up the 16 without trying it on, came home and tried it on to show Wavey and it's too big! Booooo! Not just a little bit either but like so big that Wavey could practically get his arm down the back of it. That would be a little bit too much food methinks...tis a sad state of affairs but I think the search for the party dress is going to have to go the same way as the hunt for the boots; in other words accept that it just ain't gonna happen this year *sticks out pet lip in rather forlorn manner*

We've just had to do comedy washing. The outside pipes have frozen so if we didn't supervise the wash the utility room would get totally flooded. It couldn't be put off any longer though, two bin bags full of laundry and a potential pants emergency is never good! Wavey, ever resourceful, found a large tub for the water to drain into and has been doing the equivalent of watching paint dry by supervising the washing machine. Still there is always a silver lining - cooking away is a homemade broccoli quiche which we shall be enjoying with yummy winter herb potato wedges and sunflower seed bread, YUM!

Oh, did I mention that it was minus 11 today...there's no other way to say this: it was fucking freezing!

And finally, as I always like to sign off with a little bit of entertainment, this morning's spotted from the bus station was one girl teetering along in stilettos and a black dress with no coat...had to be the walk of shame...chuckle. Happy weekend lovelies!

Thursday, 2 December 2010

Upstairs downstairs

I have a job interview on 14th December. For one of the proper jobs at work, an actual professional librarian post. As well as enduring the hell that is an interview, I also have to do a 10 minute presentation. To a panel of people. Yikey crikey crapola and a bit of EEEEK for good measure. I've never done a presentation. Actually that's not strictly true, I had to write one for my library school course but as I did it via distance learning I never actually had to stand up and do the talking thing. It's fair to say, that if I think about it for any longer than ooh about 10 seconds, I begin to completely and utterly crap myself!

I'm pretty pleased as I've actually made a start on it, prepared slides and everything. And I kind of know what I'm going to talk about but I need to get it finished and up and running so that I can stand in front of all my nearest and dearest and practice and practice until it becomes like some kind of second skin; this way when I'm in the interview I figure it'll all be plain sailing....HA! I actually kidded myself for a nanosecond there that would be true. I will be soooo nervous, truly madly deeply nervous. Just typing it there makes me get butterflies in my tummy, YIKES! CRIPES! *runs away to hide in the corner and rock back and forth like loony person*

And I have to do interview preparation as well, this is the big time! There's a really big part of me that is very excited at the thought of it. I'm thoroughly bored in my current role and would love the challenge and exciting new times. But there's also a teeny part of me that doesn't really want it. Cos it's like an actual proper job. Not just playing at being a librarian, but an actual real librarian, who would have to stand up in front of groups of people and deliver sessions on information skills and answer real research questions. Again with the cripes, yikes etc.

But that's not the only reason for the uncertainty. I'm a downstairs bod. And without being too braggy, frankly all the cool people live downstairs. This job would mean moving to be upstairs with the "upstairs" people, who have offices and don't freeze their asses off all winter like what we do. And I maybe shouldn't say this but they're not really cool...of course it's safe to say that if I did get this job they would deffo have one cool person in their team!

I'm not entirely sure what sort of chance I stand. I know I stand as good a chance as anybody, and I have got a lot of experience but often nerves can get the better of you in such situations. But you know what, I'm looking on the positive side, if I don't get it at least I can stay downstairs with my coolio peeps! Gotta find the sunny side, every time.

Wednesday, 1 December 2010

Funky of foot (and head)

Not in a kind of funky foisty way but in an ooooh look at my new wellies kind of way:

I'm not normally a gal for pink, however desperate times call for desperate measures. I resorted to the outdoor shop in town (note to self, just go straight there next time) and they had a jumble of wellies in the corner. I grabbed my size, checked for fitting and ran to the counter to buy them before I could get knocked down by some other size 7 laydee who was in the same predicament as moi. Thus new wellies. Pink and brown stripes, Peter Storm no less, fancy schmancy. However, I have discovered that no matter how new your wellies are or how brilliant your walking boots are, slush is going to get through anything! I'm thinking snow boots may be in order...

So it's still snowing. Jeez! I don't mind, in fact, have just had a jolly good tramp round the garden with a look of glee on my face at the total fun-ness of it all. But it just ain't fun when you rely on public transport to get you places. And the great British spirit that they talk about so much is not really around when you spend ages waiting for a bus, then 3 come at once, and they're all full so you usually have to stand, and all you can hear all around you is people chuntering. Some old bid had the right idea today, sack waiting in the queue, I've got me a shopping trolley and I'm going to use it to barge through all these patient people as I have to get on this bus and back to my bovril, or whatever it is that old people do.

We've had three early closures from work too. Which is actually rather nice. I'm beginning to think that I could quite happily work part time hours, if only the pay were full time...starting late, finishing early, it's simply grand! Returning to the chuntering however, there were 2 boys being rather critical about the library closing down early, it's only cos they want to get home...erm yes you would be correct. As we do also have lives that we enjoy living. In my defence however, we really have no say so in when we go home, the big bosses decide and we go, oh okay then. Who knows what tomorrow will bring. More snow no doubt!

As a final point however, I would like to say, that it doesn't matter how much it snows, or how much the winds want to howl like they're from Siberia, nothing will stop me being my usual stylish self, as this photo of me sporting my new ear band thingie clearly demonstrates: