Tuesday, 29 June 2010


It's beginning to look like the looooong saga of preparing my old house for renting may finally be over. I'd said the 1st July for the agents to start showing the tenants round so was a little surprised to find myself having to make big scary decisions yesterday afternoon at 4pm. Before me was placed a very tempting offer...with a few demands to go with it. My first instinct was to panic and instantly say no to everything. But leaving work and walking the streets of town towards the bus station I realised that I had to be sensible here. Yes it was scary. Yes I was internally eeek-ing and yikes-ing all over the place, but it was time for big grown up stuff and only I could make the decision. A crazy hour of phone calls back and forth and pounding hearts and sweaty palms later I had me a deal. If said deal comes off, and all the necessary certificates and references work out, playing hardball has got me a tenant willing to pay 6 months rent up front, with the plans to stay long term and pay 6 months up front each time. Okay so she wants to make a couple of changes which worry me slightly (plasma tv on the old walls anyone?!) but I learned a very important lesson yesterday: that not everyone lives life the same as me. Like durrrrr!

Bear with me, I think I have to explain that. In my head, I very naively thought that my perfect tenant would be just like me. They'd live like me, they'd be happy with the things in the house like I was, they'd want to use the house in the same way I did with the furniture laid out just the same...you see where I'm going with this - la la land. What a doofus!! It was only when the offer was placed on the table right in front of me that I realised that's never going to happen! People will want to erect giant televisions on old walls and might not be happy with that green carpet in the spare bedroom...to be honest I never really was myself but it was a perfectly functional carpet, not worn, not damaged, just not beige either. I feel a bit foolish for admitting the above to be honest but sometimes foolish is how it is. Anyway, all readers please keep fingers crossed that all goes according to plan and soon I shall be Landlady Dizz extraordinaire!

In other news:
  1. Wavey and I continue to do our best to systematically destroy the house and its contents. Broken glasses, broken bedside lights, pulling handles off fridge doors, shower still leaking, crash bang wallop...ooops!
  2. Moving a washing machine from the back garden down a pitch black alley in the rain at 10.30 in the pm is not the best idea. However, should you enjoy random fits of giggles and trying to walk a very slippy appliance step by painstaking step, then I'd recommend it as a fun filled half hour...
  3. The sun has been gloriously shining here. Until last night when it rained so hard it woke me up at 5am! Hopefully the sun sun sun will return as I'm hearting the summer wardrobe and flipflops muchly
  4. Eating veg grown lovingly by us is just THE BEST! We made a sweet potato and pea (right out of the pod!) curry for tea which was deeelish-us!
  5. Work is pants, bor-ring!
  6. In 2 weeks time Tizz and I will be jetting off to our summer festival. Exciting! Have only just remembered that last year T&G took quite a lot of my stuff for me so the load was light. Sadly this year they're not coming with, so should you happen to see some big haired pack horse type person struggling under the weight of a tent and double blow up bed, take sympathy, lend a hand or two. And oh PS: Florence and the Machine OMG *squeeeeal*
  7. Maximo Park on Friday for Jillybean's birthday, aren't they so kind to playing us a gig just for her...wonder if we can get them to sing Happy Birthday...

That's all folks! Ta-ta.

Saturday, 26 June 2010

Just your average Friday evening conversation

Said conversation takes place between me (that would be Aunty Dizz) and my 6 year old niece:

6: how did you meet Wavey?

me: well, we were in the same theatre group and we eventually decided we would be a couple (very long story clearly shortened dramatically)

6: and now you live in Wavey's house?

me: yep

6: are you going to get married?

me: (laughing) no

6: don't you want to be married?

me: not particularly

6: but why?

me: (shrugs shoulders) not really bothered

6: you're strange...

Friday, 18 June 2010

404 not found

It's been rather a taxing work week. We were due to switch from one version of something to other, there were promises made, "seamless...smooth..." lies! Smooth my arse! Problem-city as soon as the switch was flicked. My job share partner was sunning it in Spain (nice for some) so it was just little ole me trying to deal with all this stuff. And it might have been okay if I hadn't been drowning in techie geek speak. Seriously, there was so much jargon flying round and it's really hard when they think they're being perfectly straightforward, but to my ears, it was so foreign it was practically alien. DSN, IDP, entity, WAYFless, apache tomcat...STOP!

My favoured facial expression of the week has been a blank face. Followed by a furrowed brow. And much muttering under my breath. Oh and a few healthy expletives for good measure. Plus a lot of chuntering that the extra blimmin' 40 quid a month they're paying me for this is seriously not enough to put up with this kind of crap...ahem, well you know what I mean. They want me to help with this stuff they have to bring it down to my level, speak to me in terms that I understand pur-lease! By the end of day 1 I'd been on google so many times to put in the next baffling word, and to be honest, I still didn't really get what it was they were on about. Ho-hum. Mucho frustration and feeling a bit stoopid, not at all a state I enjoy.

But! It's Friday now therefore the weekend, yay! And on my Monday my job share partner returns and I can dump all this stuff on her desk, double yay!

As a small aside, my head really has been in the shed. I know this from my comedy typo of the week to D: maybe we can meet up after work and crap a coffee...erm, hello? Crap a coffee! Ooops!

Wednesday, 16 June 2010

An old fashioned letter

Dearest Tizz,
Most sincere greetings on this, your birthday. One hopes you are having the most merry of times and that many tasteful and lovely gifts have fallen onto your doormat. Sadly as we well know, my kind gift is not one of those. The reason behind this is that it is still in the shop and not wrapped up in charming gift wrap and contained within a padded envelope. Hopefully once purchased, the horses will speed it to you immediately, and you will love it so.

Tis such a shame that we cannot be together on this lovely day. Truly, it makes me miss you more than ever when you are not in town for such a special occasion. We should be dressing in all our finery and attending dancing venues, where handsome young men will spin us round gaily and charm us with their witty...wit. I trust a visit is soon planned and such merriment will occur.

Until that time, please find my most fondest wishes to you,
Your loving friend,
Dizz x

Sunday, 13 June 2010

Not just raining...pouring!

Remember back to Christmas when I first moved in with Wavey and within a matter of days the boiler had broken, then the shower door, then the shower? Well it seems to be that time again. First of all there was dripping from the kitchen ceiling, drip drip drip. Then the washing machine broke. Whilst it was full of water. Put that with the bloody rotten weather where it is CONSTANTLY raining, and there's a whole lot of water going on!

So the ceiling dripping and the crack growing? It's not some freaky Dr Who story, it is in fact the shower leaking. Except Wavey's just taken up half the bathroom floor and it's totally dry so it must be something to do with the pipework. Which means getting Mr Plumber in to come and take the shower unit to pieces and see what's going on there. Boooo. Cos that means lots of money in Mr Plumber's back pocket.

The washing machine was a bit of a mare. Wavey's work uniform was essentially being held hostage by our busted washing machine. First thing yesterday morning saw us armed with our washing up bowl and a jug. Wavey tipped it back and we cautiously opened the door and began the task of emptying it. About 20 bowls later we were down to the last dregs and the very dripping clothes were draped over the washing line (thank god for the sunny day!) It's the second time that it's busted in a matter of weeks which is a bit of a hint really isn't it - get a new one. This meant a visit to Evil Park, the out of town shopping complex. Ugh *shudder* and not just once but twice! First of all we went to have a look round and pick a model. Then we came home and did the interwebby research to see if we could get it cheaper elsewhere. Turned out not so we reserved it and went to pick it up. I tried chatting up the bloke at the desk to see if he'd let one of his staff come with us to help get it out of the car at the other end, but having Wavey by my side kind of put a bit of a dampener on the flirting, ho hum. So we comes home and it's me and him. Good job I'm not a weakling as between us both we managed to get it on out of the car, carry it up the two steps and down the path into the house and then drag it through the house. It's currently on its final minutes of the test spin and then we can wash our many mounds of laundry. It's so exciting: it's digital! And it's energy A which means it's super efficient. It only uses cold water which is better for the environment. And (hopefully) it will continue to work for many years to come!

Oh and I forgot to mention that the front door is busted too so that's another one to add to the list. And the toaster is doing funny things. And my ipod keeps playing silly buggers and crashing every now and then. And the open button the stereo has to be pressed about 4 times before the tray opens. Why? Why does everything break down at the same time?!

We had holiday plans for later in September. Initially we were going to go to France and do camping again. Then when the door broke we thought, hmm maybe we'll look for somewhere in England. Today we made a decision that we can't actually afford to go away at all. But we've got two weeks off work to look forward to and we'll do days out and maybe a couple of days in a B&B in the Lakes or the Dales. Sometimes it's so pants being an adult! When you're a kid it's down to someone else to worry about this kind of crap.

I hear the sound of silence (well apart from the Grand Prix on the tv) which means the washer is done. Does it make me a wee bit sad to be excited by the digital display...and the energy A certificate...and being kind to the environment? Well yah boo! Who cares? I'm off to look at the shiny newness again.

Sunday, 6 June 2010

Not quite enough for a full meal...

but getting there!