Wednesday, 29 February 2012

Big haired bounty hunter

I went to see "One for the Money" tonight based on the Janet Evanovich book series. I was a little nervous as I love the books a lot, they make me laugh out loud and Stephanie Plum is a great character. The film was ok, nowhere near as funny as the books but passed the time merrily. The best thing of all is that with Stephanie Plum, Hollywood has introduced big curly hair that's a wee bit frizzy:
Of course I'm liking as that's pretty much how my hair is. Maybe I should turn a shade of brown...or plum *chuckle*

Monday, 27 February 2012

Year of the Arse

Forget all these Year of the [insert animal here], today we officially named 2012 the Year of the Arse. I know it's early days to be saying such things about the year, but considering we're only 2 months in, so far it's been pretty shoddy. And it's not just my little corner of the world, everytime you run into someone in town it's almost like some cheap competition to see who can out-do each other with all the crap that is going on. I don't understand. From the beginning it looked like it was going to be okay but at the moment it's an almost daily grind of rubbishness. 

Take my little corner of the world, for example. So far this year we've had two parents in hospital, one parent with the Bells Palsy virus that is fiercely mean, one person bumping up into the back of our car on a fast road (all are thankfully okay, the car not so much), various parts of houses are falling down or falling off, work is utterly rubbish, Wavey has been away practically every week leaving me to battle against the world all on my lonesome...I could go on but then we might all want to shoot ourselves and where's the good in that?! I seriously would like to say that other people are having a fine and dandy old time of it but it just doesn't seem to be the case *sad sad face*

If you're out there, share your cheer! Tell us about your fabulous times as we sho' would like to hear some nice news. Hello...? Anyone...? Nope thought not. Year of the Arse. Tis official. 

Thursday, 23 February 2012

I just found this cool online app. This is the 'wordle' it created when I fed it this blog...
Wordle: DizznFizznTizz

Monday, 20 February 2012

Torture for beginners

I love shopping. I especially love shoe shopping. Oh and charity shop shopping. Hell even food shopping. But jeans shopping? Total and utter nightmare. I am now, after an afternoon of hell, totally convinced that some sadistic bastard invented it as a form of torture for normal gleeful shoppers. I can see the tagline now. Love to shop? We'll soon BEAT THAT OUT OF YOU by sending you to buy jeans. HA! Mwah ha ha haaaaaaaa!

I knew it was going to be bad. It always is. You start off feeling really good and ooh I like this pair and ooh that pair are nice, let's go and try them on and see what they look like. Enter the changing room if you dare. Once in there you will be driven to tears by stupid super skinny jeans that will not fit over feet, tiny zips that cannot seriously be meant for grown up people, low waist, high waist, jeggings, candy coloured (eeep!), skinny, boyfriend, super skinny, just goes on and on and on. And not one single pair fits how you want them to fit. And with each changing room you end up feeling more and more fat and ungainly and I might as well go and shoot myself now as I am clearly mortally obese and should just go and buy a tent as it might fit me if I'm lucky...

After approximately 3.5 hours and god knows how many changing rooms and varieties I ended up with one pair of funky red cords that I have no doubt I will love to death. And one pair of skinny jeans that aren't perfect but were the best of the bunch and at £14 I'm not arguing. They'll last as long as they last. And by the time I go jean shopping again I will of course have lost 3 stone and have a six pack and be toned to perfection...and I would bet my last penny that even those perfect people end up coming out of changing rooms with tears in their eyes, shaking their heads, with plans to go home and lose 3 stone, get a better six pack and go to the gym every single night...

I would like to end by passing two messages on. First up, to the clearly stupid people who make the jeans: people have lumps and bumps and curves and long feet and fat feet, they have bellies that need zips that are longer than 3cm and sizeable bottoms that need extra fabric in order to avoid builders bum. You, jean manufacturers, and you alone are responsible the world over for muffin top and visible bottom cracks. You should be ashamed of yourselves. 

My second message goes out to fellow jean shoppers. Take heart, it's not us that's the wrong size, shape, height, build, tis the foolish jean makers who must use some sort of Barbie-esque character as their muse. It's sheer nonsense, pay no attention, you are fabulous. They are wrong. And as long as we all know that we might just survive the jeans shopping torture. Good luck!

Saturday, 18 February 2012

Things what I learned today

  1. Painting outside when it's really really cold makes me really really grumpy
  2. Buying cheap paint ain't all that when you open the tub and it's like coloured water
  3. Glossing is a bit tricky upside down, especially when the gloss drips down the brush onto your hand and trickles down your arm
  4. Doing DIY jobs without my radio is wrong. Just wrong. Very wrong. Plain wrong
  5. I LOVE my car. Like big love
  6. Buying meat from a real proper butcher who is ruddy cheeked and smiley is so much better than supermarket bleached, puffed up cack
  7. All of my tights must be thinking it's Spring and that soon they will be redundant as they are getting baggy and saggy and crotch round the knees is not a good sight, nor is it hugely comfortable for walking
  8. Robins are feisty little birds! Especially if one of 'em thinks it's his garden and that the other one should stay out. BIRD FIGHT!
  9. Eating a huge salad for tea is actually really yummy...
  10. it allows you to follow it with a big chunk of Christmas cake
  11. We heart Kitty, Daisy and Lewis heaps. Der dum dum dum dum...
  12. Big hoop ear-rings are a bit of a hazard
  13. We are physically incapable of keeping our cream carpet clean. So far this week: oil from the petrol station, mud from the garden, and possibly coal dust or some alien black seapage from somewhere
  14. Persuading Wavey that wooden floors may be the most practical solution to our cream carpet problem - not that tough as it turns out (yay!)
  15. Leading on from above, we both like really really expensive wooden floors....

Monday, 13 February 2012

Deadly sin

Wikipedia tells me that greed is an inordinate desire to acquire or possess more than one needs, especially with respect to material wealth. 

Currently I am greedy. 

Currently I have an inordinate desire to both acquire and possess an iPad 2, 16GB, with WiFi (no colour preference stated). 

I don't need one. I don't have to have one. I just want one to expand my material wealth. 

Sadly my material wealth doesn't cover the cost of one. To put it bluntly, tough shit, Dizz. You can't have one. Get thee back to lusting and stop price comparing them as if it might actually happen. Bad girl. Bad. Naughty.

Sunday, 12 February 2012


Wavey had never heard of Pob! 

Then we started remembering other childhood legends. Who could forget this one?

We danced like teenage loons to a song that Huey was playing on BBC6 music, but I don't know what that choon here's a totally different song for you to enjoy. These guys are my number one playlist at the moment:

Saturday, 11 February 2012


Presents are brilliant. Especially presents that are essentially money so that you can buy whatever you like whenever you like. A wide variety of gift cards came my way for both Christmas and birthday:

First up I hit the clothes shops where I came away with one basic black long sleeved tee, and one lush coral jumper that is shiny sparkley and is already my favourite even though I haven't worn it yet. Top that off with one pair of black opaque tights (cos a gal can never have too many pairs of tights) and it was back to the coral for some lovely suede pumps. Next shop to spend some birthday cash on some bright funky parrot ear-rings. The bookshop was after that where I bought the new Kate Morton and the Japanese equivalent of Stieg Larsson. From there to the beauty shop to buy some new mascara, a thick black eyeliner and a raspberry coloured plastic ring. Good haul!
I found myself with £10 left over. Hmmmm, well we need something for dinner and since Wavey has been away and we're totally spoiling ourselves with our chill out weekend, let's buy dinner instead!
I was left with £1.18. It cost me £1 for the carpark...just 18p left. Sadly you can't buy anything for 18p these days so that will hit the spare change jar. 

Shopping. Isn't it brilliant?!

Wednesday, 8 February 2012

Cold cold COLD

You might have guessed that it's cold. Actually it's not just cold, it's bitter cold. I know I shouldn't complain and compared to last year when it was minus 11 it's practically balmy, but I'm so fed up of being cold. It starts in the morning when I have to scrape the ice off the car (still loving the car, like totally), then I get to libraryland and it's a cold cold place if you reside on the ground floor like what I do, then it's more cold on the walk back to the car park, and the house is cold, and my bed is brrrrrrr cold as my radiator (also known as Wavey) is working away again. Tis chilly times indeedy. 

Yesterday I wore 3 layers including one large chunky cardigan and was kinda warm, but not toasty, plus my hands remained like ice blocks. 

Today I foolishly braved only 2 layers despite one of them being super chunky and the other is my long sleeved top that is tighty-tight around my wrists so no cold drafts could get up there. It was chuffing freezing and I've spent most of the day wearing my outside scarf whilst indoors. 

Would 4 layers be too much for tomorrow? 

Is it perhaps that I keep choosing to wear short skirts cos they look funkay with my grey biker boots? 

You know what the worst thing of all is though? I'm in serious danger of turning into a hermit cos I just want to come home from work, light the fire, and not move from my sofa until I'm toasty roasty. So far this week I've turned down Zumba, and another free bingo sesh, although to be fair that is mainly because my Wavey time is presssssssshus at the moment and I'm greedy with choosing to spend my weekends with him whilst he's away so much. 

I'm dreaming of sunshine. Lovely warm sunshine. When you only require one layer of clothing and it's more than sufficient. Is it very long to wait...? 

Sunday, 5 February 2012

Taken over by the fear

This has been one hard week my blog friends. All seemed to be going okay until Wednesday when a meeting requested arrived in my workspace. Not just any meeting. A meeting with top HR bods, and top library bods, and all of our little team of four. Safe to say we were all absolutely terrified. The meeting request didn't come with any reassuring messages that all would be okay, it didn't come with any nice soft words to tell you not be scared about all those really important people coming to a meeting with you. Most of all, it didn't tell me not to be downright scared. And I was, hell we all were! 

From then on I literally lived in fear every single chuffing day until Friday. And you have no idea how long the rest of Wednesday, all of Thursday, and until 11am on Friday felt. Talk about LONG ENDLESS days when all I could think was that by Friday lunchtime I might not have a job anymore. Of course that was what we all assumed, and who can blame us. These are uncertain times, the whole world has gone completely tits up, a few job losses in libraryland doesn't seem that unrealistic. 

I felt sick. Every single day. 

On Friday before I went to work I bought a lottery ticket. It cost me £2 but I reckoned on it being a good investment with possibly my last couple of pounds on the offchance that I might win and have some money to keep me going. 

I'm pleased to report that we didn't lose our jobs, no-one did. There's some changes, but change is all fine. I can cope with change. Losing my job? I'm not so sure. I spend an unhealthy amount of time despising my job, its lack of prospects, and the daily frustration but this week has been a lesson in not taking it for granted anymore. And it's been a pretty humbling experience. I know that I will go back to the inevitable frustration, I'm only human after all and it's tough when you don't feel satisfied and challenged by your work, a place where you spend so much time. But the thought of losing that? Of not having it anymore? Genuine fear. I've never felt like that before, and I don't want to ever again.