Thursday, 31 January 2013

In 3...2...almost 1...

It's been a strange week. A huge range of emotions from excitement to complete mortification during the big leaving presentation closely followed by elation and child like glee as I scooted my way round the library on my fabulous leaving present, to today when I was angry. It's hard to explain why angry. I think it's partly knowing what I'm leaving behind, knowing that people I care about still have it to face, maybe a smidge of guilt because I'm escaping? I don't really know and can't put my finger on it to be able to describe it. I'm excited for tomorrow. Will be relieved when it's all over. A bit fearful that people might forget about me when I'm not there everyday because it really does take that extra bit of effort to make plans and get together. But mainly excitement for what is to come...


Tuesday, 29 January 2013

In 4...

It's a weird thing when you have to go through emails and documents that were so vital you created a special folder to keep them in, just to find yourself deleting them. Makes me wonder why I ever kept them in the first place really...

Monday, 28 January 2013

In 5...

(Borrowed from Pinterest)

Sunday, 27 January 2013

Be inspired

Tizz bought me this really cool diary for Christmas called the Action Diary. Each week there is some sort of action to take and so far I've managed to fulfil the actions which pleases me immensely. The challenge for this week is to write to someone who inspires me. So here we go:

Dear Karl,
I don't know who you are or how you manage to get your art out there without getting arrested as I think it probably borders on grafitti for some people, but I love it! I love the pictures, I love the ingenuity of the locations, I love what you're trying to say. Thank you for making me chuckle from grotty stinky buses. Thank you for making me stop to look closer. Thank you for making your art free to the people of this town. 

Kind regards


Friday, 25 January 2013

Third time the charm?

Once upon a time a girl called Dizz owned a house. Somewhere along the way she met a Wavey, they fell in love, and happily ever after moved in together to live in joyous sin. This left one little house all empty and sad. Temporarily an ugly sister moved in until she ate the poisoned apple and made it all turn sour. Yet again the little house was all empty and sad. Until one day in the summer of last year a beautiful princess came along with a sackful of gold and took the little house for herself. Rejoice! Rejoice! 

Fairy tale paragraph aside I was left with a golden opportunity. A chance to escape and start all over again. Could it really be three times the charm? Three times as in I started out with Media Studies determined that I was going to change the face of television and be a wonder producer. Cue giant crash as I bumped back down to earth in a mountain of debt and returned home with my tail between my legs. Next time around I tried my hand at Library and Information Management determined that it would let me advance onwards and upwards at work and that it would be totally worth the 2 years of stress and anxiety I put myself through. Cue crash back down to earth part two as I essentially sat and festered for the next six years advancing absolutely nowhere other than nearer to the loony bin. And now I hear you ask? 

As of next Friday, the 1st of February 2013, after 12 long years I will depart libraryland for good. No more library. Farewell subscriptions and electronic resources and hello full time student-land. I am again returning to education, as a proper full time student to retrain myself into something entirely new. Something exciting and opportunity-laden (fingers crossed!): I.T. Project Management. It sounds rather grand. I'm not sure where it will lead or how truly sensible it is to walk away from a full time permanent job in these very uncertain economic times, but I do know that I am very excited and oh so ready to make the move. 

Now that it's out there and people know all about it, I've had so many people tell me that it's a great decision, that I'm brave, that they're really proud...there's been a lot of "go get 'em" type of communications. This goes some way to help sway me more towards excitement than trepidation. But if I'm honest there's a lot of both going on. I feel like I'm going into this blind and I have no idea what will happen. I have all these huge plans of what I will do but the biggest thing backing me is this sheer determination that this will lead to something better, it will lead to opportunity, I will spend my time wisely by beefing up my CV with loads of good stuff that will knock socks off potential employers...I hope it will be one of my better decisions but only time will tell if this massive risk pays off. 

I'm sure I'll be blogging along the way so I hope you'll join me for the journey. And wish me luck. 
And not shake your head and tut and say what a foolish woman.

Thursday, 24 January 2013

Sunday, 20 January 2013

Operation bookshelves!

Is slowly being transformed into a snug little study. The wardrobe has gone to a good home (cheers Fizz), walls are plastered and painted (not the green of the little squares after all), a funky and very modern lampshade is up, and the shelf supports are cut (using Wavey's new favourite toy: the chop saw) and stained. I so can't wait to be able to put all the books on bookshelves again. And to show off when it's all done. Watch this space... 

Saturday, 19 January 2013


Changing room mirrors have been cruel today demonstrating in their harsh horrid light just how lumpy and bumpy I have become. It's probably a good thing, sometimes you need a wake up call. Wake up! Get thee to the gym! Stop eating cake! Eat less move more - the new motto of 2013. 

And to keep me inspired here is a picture from my most favourite series at the moment, The Hour. Romola Garai has the most amazing bottom and I'm sure all the camera people know this as there are lots of shots of her walking away, lingering on her most fabulous bottom. It didn't prove that easy to find a photo of said bottom but there are lots of pictures out there of her gorgeous self:
Romola, you shall be my inspiration!  

Wednesday, 16 January 2013


Nothing overly concerning but a few things this week have made me stop and have a little hmmm that's worrying moment. Here's a few examples:
  • There was football on the tv on one side or Gok Wan doing his wardrobe transforming thing on the other. For a short moment Wavey lingered on Gok Wan and appeared to be interested...thankfully it was only fleeting and world order has been restored - the footy is back on the tv
  • I've been taking Berocca in an attempt to restore myself to my former glory, pre-evil cough and cold. Don't ask me how I found this out but alarmingly, drinking Berocca makes your pee rather flourescent yellow. I've finished the packet now and am glad about this. I definitely do not think that pee should be shades of highlighters
  • Snow might very well stop play *sad face* we are supposed to be going to Buxton in the Peak District this weekend to celebrate both our birthdays but the pending white out / blizzard conditions are putting us off driving into the wilds possibly never to return
  • My car is freezing outside and inside. This is to be expected in minus winter temperatures but I'm pretty sure the car is not supposed to have ice crystals on the inside. What with that and the orange steering warning light methinks Zippy is not too well...
  • The cough is not as rattle-y as it was and is hugely improved but every now and then this pathetic wheeze will appear. Pah to the evil cold and cough
  • I have really dry skin on my eyelids (say what?) and the skin on the tips of my fingers is also suffering and pretty raw. This doesn't happen when I'm in the summer sun in France. Clearly this is a message that my skin prefers sun and summer to coldy cold cold and winter
  • The snow has forced me into wearing the same pair of boots for 5 days. Sheesh... 

Sunday, 6 January 2013

Hello 2013!

First things first though, let's do this right and say goodbye to 2012 by trotting out these questions and answers...

 1. What did you do in 2012 that you'd never done before?
I challenged myself several times in the kitchen but I think my biggest thing was only a matter of days ago when I stuffed and baked a whole salmon that was essentially the size of a whale. Somehow it fit in the oven. Somehow I managed to make it taste delicious (so I've been told) even though I had the biggest stinker of an evil cold and felt like death warmed up. Sadly I couldn't really taste how nice it was so I'll just have to do it all over again to enjoy the full yumminess.

2. Did you keep your new year's resolutions and will you make more for next year?
I stopped making resolutions a long time ago. If you're going to grab life by the horns and make it yours it's kind of an all year round thing, not just a first few days of the year.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
Yep, right at the end of the year! On 31st December, the second baby M was born, hello little boy! I've not been to see the family yet due to aforementioned stinker of a cold which will not go away (mutha-effer) but once I'm all perky and chipper I'll be there with bells on for my cuddle!

4. Did anyone close to you die?
Towards the end of the year was not such good times sadly. One of my work colleagues and friends lost her fight with cancer. She was 40. It was beyond sad and I spent a lot of time welling up when I least expected it. I don't really know how to put into words how sad I am for her family...

5. What countries did you visit?
We returned to France and had the most wonderful of holidays in a beautiful house that was miles from anything, where you had to drive across a bridge with no sides over a river, along a twisty turny path. When I close my eyes I can still see my steps where I sat basking in the sunshine, admiring the most amazing view. Definitely a holiday never to be forgotten.

6. What would you like to have in 2013 that you lacked in 2012?
The jury is still out on this one. I'm really really hoping for something but I'm not saying too much in case it doesn't happen...

7. What dates from 2012 will remain etched upon your memory?
I know it's a little shallow but probably the France holiday in September. I've never before felt like I needed a holiday so much as I did this year. The summer was so tough at work and I was counting down the days desperately until we went. When we finally arrived on 1st September I knew it was going to be something special and for 2 weeks it truly was just amazing and unforgettable times.

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
Surviving yet another year in the hole that is my work. I think it's safe to say that I'm almost at breaking point and if something doesn't happen soon...well I may not be responsible for my actions...

9. What was your biggest failure?
Letting the work stuff get to me. Every day I vow to myself that I'm not going to let it get to me, yet every day I come home and spend a good proportion of the evening talking about it. If I make any resolution for this year (and as you've read I don't really do that) it will be to amend this situation. It will not get the better of me, it really won't! 

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
This year I was broken! I had a hairline fracture of one of my metatarsels. It doesn't really sound much but it really really hurt! There's still times now, months later when it twinges a little bit and I'm really not convinced that it has straightened out correctly. But it hasn't affected the shoe buying too much which is good news.

11. What was the best thing you bought?
A really cool, retro looking docker for my ipod. It's ace! And the sound is amazing and I love it lots!

12. Whose behaviour merited celebration?
My work colleague and friend who finally lost her battle with cancer. Right up until the end she fought that fucker with determination and humour that never ceased to amaze me. It was truly inspiring and so brave.

13. Whose behaviour made you appalled and depressed?
Nick Clegg. Sell out. Judas. Dick. I could go on but it would just descend into name calling. Whenever he comes on the tv I shout at him. Rude words that would make my mam blush.

14. Where did most of your money go?
Insurance. I really don't like insurance companies. 

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
My car! I've been able to drive since I was 17 but until I was 37 I had never ever had my very own car. On 4th January 2012 Zippy came into my life and he's just the best! I love walking out of the house into my warm and dry car. I love that it takes me 8 minutes to drive to work instead of sitting on a stinky bus with stinky people for anything from 50 minutes to well over an hour depending on traffic. I know that cars are not very green. But you know what? Cars rule! At least they do when you get your very own for the first time ever!

16. What song will always remind you of 2012?
"Obsessions" by Marina and the Diamonds. I don't think it came out last year but I spent a lot of time listening to it and singing along to it and dancing to it and blasting it out of my new ipod docker speakers. Great song! 

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
a) happier or sadder? Probably about the same. I'll be really happy when this evil cold and cough are gone from my life!
b) thinner or fatter? No doubt fatter. Wavey and I ate a box of matchmakers between us one day over Christmas. We're not proud but we did it. Bananas are my new friend...
c) richer or poorer? For the first time ever I can say richer. Selling a house will do that for you.

18. What do you wish you'd done more of?
More holidays! Normally we aim for about 5 a year with short breaks but we only really crammed in a couple which is way under my requirements. More holidays this year for definite!

19. What do you wish you'd done less of?
Moaning. Whining. No more!

20. How will you be spending Christmas?
We went up to my folks which was lovely. Well it would have been if Wavey hadn't been feeling like death with the evil cold and cough which I then got...Christmas was illness for us this year and it was rubbish!!

21. For some reason this question is AWOL.

22. Did you fall in love in 2012?
Over and over again...

23. How many one night stands?
A good girl never tells...

24. What was your favourite TV programme?
Oooh tricksy! There's been a lot of good stuff that I've really enjoyed. Revenge was surprisingly good, series 2 starts tomorrow, exciting! For consistently making me laugh I'm going to go with The Big Bang Theory. I just love it!

25. Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?
Can I say Nick Clegg again...?

26. What was the best book you read?
Sometimes, because I read so much, the books tend to roll into one but there have been some stand outs. I've just finished "A million little pieces" by James Frey which was very hard to read, as in the subject matter, but I love his style and it left me thinking and keeps popping into my head every now and then.

27. What was your greatest musical discovery?
It's been quiet on the old music front this past year. I did go to a pretty special gig that was labelled as Get Cape Wear Cape Fly, but was actually Sam Duckworth (the lead singer) and he was amazing and a really interesting guy. There was only a handful of people there and I felt priviledged to be one of them.

28. What did you want and get?
Great and memorable times with my special peeps. They know who they are and I hope that 2013 will see more.

29. What did you want and not get?
A way out of my job hole.

30. What was your favourite film of this year?
Another tricksy question! I always find this hard to answer. I can tell you that my least favourite film of the year was Silver Playbooks Lining or whatever it was called. Don't see that. It was grim. 

31. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
I was 37 and we had a cocktail party! Peeps got dressed up like lay-deez and gents in dresses and suits and we pretended like we were in Mad Men!

32. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
Less time whining / moaning / wanting to strangle people. I'm working on it...

33. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2012?
A never ending search for funky boots. I found a couple of pairs but never really did find a replacement for my knee high purple suede boots that will always be my most beloved pair of boots ever.

34. What kept you sane?
A lot of ranting and whining and moaning. Also saying what I really wanted to say with my thinking voice whilst something else entirely came out of my mouth.

35. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
Bradley Cooper. He is definitely hot. And Nigella. Girl crush central. 

36. What political issue stirred you the most?
I found myself deeply interested in the US election and was very relieved when Obama was re-elected. On the home front I am often "stirred" by the Clegg / Cameron nightmare and by stirred I mean shouting at the tv and calling them very bad names. I have also been appalled to read in several places now how many people in the UK are so poor that they can't afford to eat. This makes me very sad and often finds me considering opening a soup kitchen from my front garden. Seriously. It just might happen one day soon.

37. Who did you miss?
This may sound a little feeble but my answer here is Wavey. He was away a LOT last year and it will probably be the same this year. I really really really miss him when he's away and do a lot of the bravado thing. I freely admit that I'm a total puff.

38. Who was the best new person you met?
I'm not sure I did meet anyone new who left a lasting impression, that's kind of sad. But we did start spending more time outside of theatre with a couple of people and we go for regular brunch and we laugh and laugh and talk about really interesting and creative stuff, I love it!

39. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2012:
It is possible to actually make yourself smaller when you're stuck in a room and really don't want to hear what someone is saying soooo much. If you start to slide down your chair and tuck your head into your body your ears become kind of muffled. It might look a bit odd but it works a treat at blocking out unwanted noise.

40. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year:
Lose your dreams and you could lose your mind...ain't life unkind. The Rolling Stones. I'm thinking of getting it tattooed on my body somewhere. 

Final thoughts:
2012 - survived. 2013 - bring it!