Sunday 25 February 2007

I didn't think you were hairdressers...

Last night saw me attend not one, not two, but three parties. Rock n'roll baby. The first one was K's hen night from work. We always knew this was going to be a good'un cos she's not exactly a fading wallflower. I'm not sure if it was the flashing willy deely boppers that alerted me to this or the cucumber that she had to suck on each time she took a dare out of the hen night tin. Give her credit, she lived up to every challenge exceptionally well. I think my favourite was to find the equivalent of the Spice Girls in men and get a kiss from each of them. Being pretty freaking tall in my red stilettos I had a great vantage point in the pub and managed to find Posh for her - it was his quiff and pink shirt that gave him away. Glad you had a great night K, here's to the wedding...it really is REAL now! Eek!

From there I went along to another party and met D and her workmates for drinks. Cat joined me for these drinkies. We plonked ourselves down with this group of people. I knew a few but others hadn't met me before. All were fascinated by the flashing willy deely boppers (great ice breakers, if anyone wants to borrow I will gladly pass them on...) and talk went round to the usual chitchat smalltalk that these things take. Until one guy pointed at my flashing willy deely boppers and asked me if I like them or girls. Direct quote, I kid you not. Trying hard not to lose any of my Corona whilst snorting through my nose, I pointed at the flashing deely boppers and chuckled muchly. The poor guy was mortified. Apparently the fact that both Cat and I have short hair and I have funky eyewear with my new glasses means that we are lesbians. Obviously people. I mean come on, keep up here. Tee hee. That's a first for me I tell you, being asked outright like that!

Cat and I then decided to leave this sweet group as I was off to my final party of the night. We headed out to the main road and were innocently waiting for the green man to flash us over the road when this man commented on Cat's funky 60s print dress. He proceeded to cross the road with us, chatting all the while, conversation including where one finds a decent shagpile carpet these days, did we want to go to the Bongo with him, were we designers cos he didn't think we were hairdressers...truly bizarre moment. Thankfully a taxi did a prompt u-turn to pick us up and we piled in gratefully. Madness.

So to my final party destination. More Corona. Any snacks? What, a girl has to eat regularly! I left there at about 3am and click-clacked my way back to my house in my red stilettos. Sheesh, what a night. Every Saturday night should have 3 parties, if only to come across all that bizarreness for blog tales!

Oh PS. doesn't everyone realise that footless tights are passe now and that smock tops really do make the thinnest of girlies look like they're about to drop a sprog?
Ta-ta xx

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Yes, Footless tights have now reached the crown pub in brotton, definetley passe!

Anonymous said...

hilarious, you reminded me of some bits I'd forgotten!

but you missed the bit where he compared my dress to an IKEA cushion!

Cx

fizz said...

Yay! Your new glasses are back! Glad to hear it. They are booby, gravy. (That´s a Fred-ism, he meant groovy, baby. Bless.)

The lesbian thing - welcome to my world. I get asked that all the time. Nyeh.