Monday 2 March 2009

Wimps the Pair of You

I am very disappointed in Dizz and Wavey for not going through with their plan at the weekend. Tcha!

Let me introduce a new blog character: the evil Een.
The evil Een is well named because she is actually eeeevilllll. Unfortunately she is besotted with Wavey. I mean she lurves him; she takes every opportunity to stroke him and press up against him. She giggles like a schoolgirl when he's around. Wavey finds this extremely uncomfortable; the rest of us find it hilarious. At the moment, the evil Een is totally unaware that there's anything more than friendship between Dizz and Wavey. When she finds out we fully expect her to explode with jealousy/rage/malice.

So, Dizz'n'Fizz'n'Tizz plus Wavey were at a party at the weekend. The evil Een was there too. Dizz and Wavey had a plan - they were going to have a snog right in front of the evil Een. I was very excited about this because 1) it would be interesting to see a human being explode and 2) if she didn't explode we would all be there to shield Dizz from the evil Een's malevolence. A cunning plan! Dizz and Wavey wouldn't be found guilty in any court of law just for having a snog (something I'm fairly certain they've done before) and there was a very good chance we might be rid of the evil Een permanently. (If you think this seems a tad harsh - remember I am prone to hyperbole, and she really is evil, honest.)

Then they wimped out. Pah! I say, pah!

5 comments:

Claire said...

Sputter sputter, how very dare you suggest that Wavey and I have snogged! Excuuuuse me! We haven't got past the holding hands stage dontcha know. I am feeling quite faint at the very suggestion and must now go and lie down...

fizz said...

You seem to have blocked New Year out of your conscious mind...

Anonymous said...

in my best Bertie Wooster voice ...

a peck on the cheek at the 12o'clock chime is perfectly acceptable I think !

Dash it all Fizz if you were a chap we'd be having harsh words indeed :-)

Anonymous said...

I can back Dizz up they were like a perfect 'courting' couple at our house, not a tongue in sight! The only 'issue' was that Dizz was there with 'Steve' not Wavey - don't know if that poses a problem!
Rx

PS i'm going to stop using inverted commas now! I know how irritated you are by the overuse of punctuation!

fizz said...

I'm not that bad honest! I have no issues with inverted commas in any kind of text. However I do sometimes have a very slight homicidal impulse when people overdo the inverted comma gesture when speaking. Am I wrong?