Sunday, 14 September 2008

Posh pudding to dog rough in 2 days

As I post this tonight, I will officially be caught up, yay! This has been a very busy week, it has to be said.

Friday night saw me heading off to Fizz's for our much loved viewing of Ugly Betty, and the new treat of it being accompanied by food. The previous week it was home made burgers in a "soft bap" which were very yummy indeedy. Wavey had come along to join in the fun, but declared the lads of his footy team more important this week, which is fair enough really as let's face it, UB is more of a girlie thing, and one thing Wavey ain't and never will be is girlie. Anyhoo this week saw a yummy vegetable pizza, lots of green stuff, nice juice. And then a surprise for pudding. Oooh thinks I, what has Fizz cooked up? Turns out it was actually Asda who cooked it up and not Fizz, but hey I'm not fussy. And pudding was Creme Brulee. Yum-my! Fizz informed me that this is a very posh pudding. And that it isn't actually just custard as I had always thought with a crunchy sugar topping, but is actually pronounced coustarrrrrd (phonetic version there). Personally anything that requires a blow torch when you see chefs making it is pretty damned cool. I can report that it was very tasty. And UB was funny. And Friday night was over.

Which leads me very nicely to Saturday night. For that evening the plans were to celebrate D's birthday in style. First up we were heading to our local much loved cinema to watch the Sex and the City movie again. And to enjoy the cocktails that were being served up. And to dress up as total girlies and revel in the utter girlieness. Our friend from way back who we recently found again via the joy of facebook, KB was to join us. Afterwards we were to continue the drinking and end up dancing. Best laid plans and all that...

The movie went well. The cocktails were extra yummy. Mainly because we could take them in with us to watch the movie. How utterly mahhhhhvellous dahhhhlings. We came out of the movie and teetered our way towards the club. It was pretty dead so we decided that more drink was in order before we ventured in. So we headed off into the town towards the Tommy Sheraton. As we approached the traffic lights to cross over a woman appeared behind us who was 50 if she was a day. She was wearing a bright yellow dress. Which clashed lovely with her glowing orange skin and bleached blonde hair. She called us darlings and asked us if we were heading to the Wobbly Goblin. I need to know the way there, says she. As I did know the way I kindly volunteered to take her that way. I warned her that it wasn't that nice a place, cos the only knowledge I have of it is that someone we knew met someone in there and they ended up shagging in a I have to say more? As we began the walk she informed us that she'd just "smashed some fucking girl's head in" (direct quote) to which my reply was, well maybe you'll be okay then...eeeek! I led her a bit further along to the road she needed to go down, all the while conscious of D and KB being very nervous of this well dodgy character with us. Thankfully she'd obviously got her physical violence out of the way for the evening as she teetered off towards the Goblin.

Dodgy woman out of the way we headed into our destination. And encountered the most screechiest woman I have ever heard. Everytime she laughed we were clutching our glasses as we feared that they were going to shatter. It was hideous. As you can well imagine we didn't stay there that long.

The next destination was the club. To tell the truth we're a bit sick of nights out in M'bro so we thought we'd give it a try in this club in Stockton. We paid our fiver. Had our hand stamped with PAID and entered a teeny tiny dive. The first bad point was that they didn't sell wine. Say what? Second bad point was that the guy at the bar looked about 12. The third bad point was when the band, The Clashed came on. They were ear splittingly loud. Conversation was out of the question. They had their very own Bez who kept going around and gesturing at everyone whilst dancing around the whole wee dancefloor totally crazily. One guy took his shirt off to show us his fine physique (nice beer belly) and his array of tattoos. Many songs I'd never heard later, they launched into Should I Stay or Should I Go. KB decided it would be a good time to hit the dancefloor. And there was one man who was very happy about this. He tried to grope her. She shoved him away. He pulled her back on the dancefloor. She took control of the situation and carried on dancing and shoving him away at each attempt. At the end of this mad dance, he came over to us, roughly grabbed each of our faces and kissed us! Funnily enough it was at that point we decided it was time to head out of there.

We stood outside for a while pondering our moves and decided to get pizza and head back to mine. Once again we trotted off down to Gino's for the best pizza and garlic bread. Along the way we happened to see a girl who was wearing a neon orange skirt that barely covered her backside, a neon orange bikini top, and what can only be described as a gold fishing net strung across her body in a manner that she probably thought was the bees was bad. Very bad. Did I mention she was orange as well? A vision in orange. The pizza shop wasn't any better. There was a very drunk woman swaying on her wedges holding onto her parmo for dear life. She flung her arm out to make a point and threw her mobile phone across the pizza shop and it scattered into bits. I picked up her battery and handed it to her and she slurred "thanks darling". The final point of the evening was our incredibly grumpy taxi driver who grunted his way home. Oh happy days.

And there you have it. What a week! I'm off on my holidays from work this week so will keep you posted about what I get up to.

Later alligator x

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