Looking forward

There's a ridiculous rumour that on my next birthday I will be 40. FORTY. No way. 

I've just finished reading Tina Fey's book, Bossypants, and one chapter is about turning 40. This is what she has to say: 

I need to take my pants off as soon as I get home. I didn't used to have to do that. But now I do. 

This is what I have to say to that:

Oh...